#CleanHumor Lessons from Octavia Spencer

When the news of Britney Spears and Sam Asghari's engagement broke, many took to social media to congratulate the couple...and some jokes were made. Among others, Academy Award-winning actor Octavia Spencer commented: "Make him sign a prenup."

The thing about jokes is that they are unexpectedly powerful. When someone can make us laugh, we listen and pay attention to them more. Humor creates camaraderie. It allows us to lower our guards and not think critically about what we're being told - all while the message still gets across. At their best, jokes bring joy into our lives (see: Clean Humor). At their worst, jokes belittle, marginalize, and ostracize people. Jokes often contain subtle (or not-subtle) signals about our values, our beliefs, and our norms. And sometimes, if we've said something that might be hurtful to others - intentionally, or not - we have to try to make it right.

Octavia Spencer joked to Britney Spears that she make her new fiance sign a prenup. As far as jokes go, this may seem harmless. Some people might admit that they thought the same exact thing, or simply think that it's just good advice. But the implications of the joke could be that he isn't worthy, that he's using her, or that she needs to protect herself from him. Ultimately, whatever the implications, their prenuptial arrangements are none of anyone's business - and they're nothing to joke about.

To her credit, Octavia Spencer quickly realized that her joke was inappropriate - and she took steps to make it right. In the process, she provided a mini-masterclass on how to correct for lighthearted missteps.

We applaud Octavia Spencer for so quickly and publicly owning that her intended joke wasn't funny. Ms. Spencer's actions and post after making the joke create a mini-playbook for what to do when you say something you think might get a laugh, but was actually hurtful or wrong to say: apologize directly, own it publicly, and personally commit to doing better. We're all learning our way into #CleanHumor...but at least now, we can look to Octavia Spencer's example.